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Spanish Linguistics This forum is intended to explore Spanish language linguistics. Discuss terminology, vocabulary, grammatical approach and style and other Spanish linguistics issues.

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Old 10-26-2009, 01:48 AM   #1
phoenix9
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Question correcciones para un poema

¡Hola! Tengo una petición poco extraño, pero posiblemente interesante si tienes el tiempo.

Hay unos años desde que la última vez escribe alguno en español, y de verdad, no sé porque he escrito esto en español (probablemente es porque la mujer es cubana. Sin embargo, he escrito un poema en español. Es un poco triste, pero describe mis sentimientos de el momento. De todos modos, es difícil para traducirle esta y por lo tanto es difícil ver si hice errores terribles (me da miedo que es posible que decir algo muy diferente de que quise decir).
¿Puede Uds. ayudarme?
---------------
Hello! I have a kind of odd request, but possibly an interesting one if you have the time.

It has been a very years since the last time I wrote anything in Spanish and, truth be told, I don't really know why I wrote this in Spanish (probably because the woman [it deals with] is Cuban. Nevertheless, I have written a poem in Spanish. It is a little bit sad, but it describes my current feelings. In any case, it is a bit difficult to translate, so its hard to tell if I made any terrible errors (i.e. I'm worried I said something far off from what I intended).

I was curious if anybody could help me out.

Equi es el poema:
Here is the poem:
Quote:
El mundo en verde.

El mundo está velado en verde.
Lo no es verdad, pero como yo veo.
Y no puedo obligar a aclararse la vista.
Son muchos razones. Las sabes, yo creo.

La problema es que me gustas mucho.
Y para él, no tengo malevolencia.
La verdad es que son una pareja guapa
Pero él no es yo. Ergo no eres mía.

La bonita rosa, quien nunca podrás quererme
Eres lista, divertida, interesante, y amable
Eres más linda de creía posible
Pero ninguna razón es, para esto, responsable

Me alegro de verte, por consiguiente
Quiero hacer mi papel, si solo como amigo
Pero es muy difícil hacer esto ahora
Porque me lastima aun ver él contigo

No sé que debo hacer, no sé que debo creer
No sé que debo decirte, no sé debo seguir

La hora he llegado cuando te necesito preguntar
¿Cómo piensas de mí?
¿Cómo piensas debo progresar?
¿Cómo quieres progreso?

~D.B. Guy (October 29, 2009)


Y aqui es algo similar que yo pienso:
And here is approximately what I was thinking:
Quote:
The world in green.

The world is veiled in green.
It's not how it is, but its how I see it.
And I cannot make the view clear [/cannot make my sight clear]
There are many reasons. I think you know them.

The problem is that I like you a lot
And I bear him no ill-will.
The truth is you make a cute couple
But he is not I; therefore you are not mine.

The beautiful, pink woman [/the beautiful flower (word order wrong)], who may never want me,
You are intelligent, fun, interesting, and kind
You are cuter than I ever thought possible
But none of these reasons are responsible for this [my envy, the poem,etc.]

It makes me happy to see you, consequently
I want to play my part, if only as a friend
But it is difficult to do right now
Because it hurts me to even see him with you

I don't know what to do, I don't know what to think[/believe]
I don't know what to tell you, I don't know if I should continue

The hour has come where I must ask you:
How do you think of me?
How do you think I should move on?
How do you want me to move on?

¡Muchas gracias!
Thanks!

~Donald

P.S. No creo si esto es en el foro correcto. Si no, por favor envíelo allí.
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