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Thread: Is the last part of my essay please take a look!!

 
  1. #1
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    Default Is the last part of my essay please take a look!!

    Hello my friends I am writting a essay about my study proposal but I think I have many grammatical mistakes, can you take a look at it. PLEASE

    Currently, I am working in a research paper based on my Master thesis dissertation. My plan is to continue with research which I have been involved in the past two years. I plan to continue with a research at the doctoral level “An Ethnographic Research of Peruvian Female in Japan: Social and cultural changes in the Migration Process.The basis of this study is on my master thesis research. I founded that Peruvian families living in Japan have significantly changed their relationships and responsibilities within the household members. The situation in most cases is the result from their focus on financial savings, which compels parents to work more hours per day and remain in the factories during all day. The circumstances in which Peruvians do not balance correctly their time inside and outside the household have originated a serious gap with their children. In this sense, my study will significantly focus on the Peruvian female, her adaptation, her challenges and responses to a new environment. My research will focus on the analysis and evolution of Peruvian women ethnic self-identification after living in Japan for some years. I consider that the new dynamics for female Peruvians which exhibit diverse qualities, such as more independence from the household work and high contribution to the family’s economy have significantly modified the traditional gender roles. Peruvian women in Japan are creating a new type of Peruvian women which greatly differ from the traditional role that Peruvians wives have in the home country. A comparative analysis of Peruvian women in Japan and Peruvian women from the home country will help to better understand how female Peruvians are constructing their identities in different spaces and times, how social groups are evolving in the host country, and how they are developing their ethnic group perspectives. Finally, I plan to teach at the University level and my future researches will build upon my study fieldwork. Research projects will develop and continue with studies of ethnic identity, transnational networks, international migration related with education and gender.

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    Default Re: Is the last part of my essay please take a look!!

    For me your essay is good. There is no need to be corrected about your grammar. You can submit your essay as your study proposal.
    Last edited by shanerm09; 08-07-2010 at 02:56 AM.

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    Default Re: Is the last part of my essay please take a look!!

    Podrķa sugerir algunos cambios, pero no muchos. Bien hecho.


    Currently, I am working in a research paper based on my Master thesis dissertation. My plan is to continue with research which I have been involved in the past two years. I plan to continue with (omit a) research at the doctoral level “An Ethnographic Research of Peruvian Female in Japan: Social and cultural changes in the Migration Process. The basis of this study is (omit on) my master thesis research. I propose that Peruvian families living in Japan have significantly changed their relationships and responsibilities within the household members. The situation in most cases is the result of their focus on financial savings, which compels parents to work more hours per day and remain in the factories (omit during) all day. The circumstances in which Peruvians do not properly balance (omit correctly) their time inside and outside the household have caused a serious divide between them and their children. In this sense, my study will (omit significantly) focus primarily on the Peruvian female, her adaptation, her challenges and responses to a new environment. My research will focus on the analysis and evolution of the Peruvian woman's ethnic self-identification after living in Japan for some years. I consider that the new dynamics for female Peruvians which exhibit diverse qualities, such as more independence from the household work and high contribution to the family’s economy have significantly modified the traditional gender roles. Peruvian women in Japan are creating a new type of Peruvian women which greatly differ from the traditional role that Peruvians wives have in the home country. A comparative analysis of Peruvian women in Japan and Peruvian women from the home country will help to better understand how female Peruvians are constructing their identities in different spaces and times, how social groups are evolving in the host country, and how they are developing their ethnic group perspectives. Finally, I plan to teach at the University level and my future researches will build upon my study fieldwork. Research projects will develop and continue with studies of ethnic identity, transnational networks, and international migration as related to education and gender.
    Last edited by gernt; 08-05-2010 at 05:28 PM.

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