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Thread: Creative Writing in Spanish

 
  1. #1
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    Default Creative Writing in Spanish

    As I mentioned in my newbie intro, I write speculative (SF & fantasy) fiction and poetry.

    One of the translation problems I'm having is how to deal with made-up words, combined words, and portmanteaus.

    Does Spanish have an equivalent way of doing this?
    Examples of made-up words would be wolfirana, ulceremiosis.
    Examples of combined words would be flutterstrive, transparentmute, bloomship.
    Examples of a portmanteau would be flapping + flickering = flackering or ocular + robot = ocubot.

    The other issue I have is with the poetic forms themselves. Free verse is no problem -- most of them are in present or simple past tense so the verb conjugations are easy. But I don't know if it's possible to retain exact forms, rhythms, and rhymes.
    One poem in particular uses square dance calls (Up to the center and back to the bar, up to the center and form a star). What would be some Spanish versions of square dance calls?
    Another poem uses an ancient rhyming pattern (the words don't always rhyme at the end of the line).

    Any thoughts? Suggestions for either challenge?

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    Default Re: Creative Writing in Spanish

    Testing this poem from "Under Every Moon", to see whether I'm on the right track.

    Camino en el Blanco


    La primavera florece tan dulce, tan breve
    y los dientes del verano brilla la sonrisa
    en el recuardo distante.
    El ontoño llega demasiado temprano,
    queda mucha demasiado frio ...agudo ...largo.

    Camino solo en el blanco,
    envuelto en trajes jirones tan delgada
    y frágil como el cuerpo que abrace
    con poco para tierra reclamar,
    con poco alimentar l'ave ... el zorro ... el oso.

    Camino oeste en el blanco,
    y sí llego del mar-ruta lejano,
    las orcas y las focas
    cantas vosotros bienvenidos con mí
    donde el agua es la lanza ... el vidrio ... el hueso.


    The English version:

    I Walk in White

    Springtime bloomed so sweet, so brief
    and teeth of summer flash a grin
    in distant memory.
    Autumn came too early,
    lingered far too chill ... sharp ... long.

    I walk alone in white,
    wrapped in tattered robes as thin
    and fragile as the body they enfold,
    with little for the land to claim,
    little to nourish bird ... fox ... bear.

    I walk west in white
    and if I reach the far sea-road
    the orca and the seals
    will sing their welcome to me
    where water is spear ... glass ... bone.

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    Default Re: Creative Writing in Spanish

    Hi Metal, I could do some corrections for your translation.

    Camino en blanco

    La primavera florece tan dulce, tan breve
    y los dientes del verano destellan una sonrisa
    en el recuardo distante.
    El ontoño llega demasiado temprano,
    queda por demás frio ...agudo ...largo.

    Camino solo en el blanco,
    envuelto en trajes jirones tan delgados
    y frágiles como el cuerpo que abrazan,
    con poco para la tierra a reclamar,
    poco para alimentar al ave ... al zorro ... al oso.

    Camino oeste en el blanco,
    y sí alcanzo el camino del mar lejano,
    las orcas y las focas
    me cantarán su bienvenida
    donde el agua es lanza ... vidrio ... hueso.

    The articles in spanish (el, la, los, las, etc.) could be difficult for implement, are a tricky issue for the Spanish Translation.

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    Default Re: Creative Writing in Spanish

    Thank you for the feedback, Salvadorm! It's very helpful, very valuable.

    And you're right -- the articles (as well as the prepositions) are quite a challenge for me right now. Not so much in regard to gender, but when & how to blend them with prepositions and how to place the wording in the correct or most effective order. Oh, and when it's acceptable to leave them out.

    I've applied your corrections for this poem and studying them as I work on the next poem in my collection. LOL By the time I get through all 50 of them, I hope to be fluent enough to tackle translating a short SF story.

    Again, muchas gracias!

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    Default Re: Creative Writing in Spanish

    Here's my next translation attempt (a short one). It's a cinquain, but I'm not terribly concerned if it doesn't hold to the exact syllable count or line breaks.
    Las serpientes de nieve
    danza hipnótica heladas mientras me
    encuentra afebril ojos huelga las mordeduras
    de hielo veneno

    Snow snakes
    dance for me while
    frosty hypnotic eyes
    strike feverless bites of ice
    venom.


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    Default Re: Creative Writing in Spanish

    Serpientes de nieve
    Dancen para mi,
    mientras helados e hipnóticos ojos
    golpeando con Valerosos mordizcos de hielo
    Veneno.

    the only word that make me hesitate is "feverless" for me, it means "without fever", I am sure that you aren't using it literally, by context I suppose that means something like "Brave".

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    Default Re: Creative Writing in Spanish

    I think I see what I did wrong, Salvadorm, but I'm a bit confused on a couple of the words. I think the problem may be too many dictionaries that don't always agree 100% about a word's usage. "Encontrar" in one shows a sub-meaning of "to strike", but now I wonder if it's a variation of "to find" (as in, to strike a motherlode, to strike oil). While I've been digging into this, I found that "picar" as well as "golpear" means "to strike/bite" but a couple of reference books give "picar" the specific verb usage for biting animals/insects/snakes.

    The other word was mordeduras versus mordizcos. Not at all sure where I went awry with that one.

    I did, indeed, mean the afebril/feverless to be literal with the implication that the ice venom freezes the victim rather than causing fever. But I really wasn't sure if adding the a- to "febril" was acceptable or if I was missing some other form of the word.

    Can the a- prefix be used with other words to indicate "without" in the the way English uses the -less suffix or un- prefix? For examples, would these adjectives be correct: asangre -- bloodless, amudo -- unmuted?

    I'm trying to thoroughly understand each one before going to the next poem. Some of the other poems are not only longer, but also more complex in structure and vocabulary. Thank you for the help!
    Last edited by metalikhan; 07-22-2013 at 10:46 AM.

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    Default Re: Creative Writing in Spanish

    An afterthought:

    I'm having major difficulty finding Spanish terms for parts of spinning wheels and techniques in yarn spinning. I've had slightly better luck with a few weaving & loom terms but not all of the ones I need.

    Likewise, I'm hunting for horsemanship terminology in Spanish.

    Can anyone recommend resources (especially free or inexpensive!) that cover specialty vocabularies in-depth?

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